Friendships Are Hard Work.

 “Everyone is busy, and life happens. I have learnt you have got to text people when you think of them. A simple “thinking of you” text can go a long way.” Rob Lowe


Since I have stopped paper crafting, I have found that I have not been keeping up with friendships in the way I used to.  Very often, I would be making a greetings card and suddenly a friend would pop into my head and with the help of my husband, who always remembers to post items, the card would find its destination.

Very often a friend would pop into my head and I am in the middle of doing something so I often say, “I must ring Mary/Isolde…when I am finished”.  And what happens?  Yes, you are correct, I totally forget.

Now you may say that friendship is a two-way system, and of course it is.  However, the interaction must start somewhere, so why not with me?

I was trying to work out how I could put a stop to “I will ring/text later” thoughts while sipping a cuppa on the back door step early this morning.  My initial response was to set up a time and then send a text to friends on a rota system.  Firstly, I am not that organised (I used to be).  Secondly, it feels very contrived.

While watching the garden birds and mentally organising the back garden with bikes  overflowing with flowers, buckets with herbs and walls with climbing plants it suddenly hit me.  I always have a notebook and pen on me no matter where I am or what I am doing.  So why not note down the name and in the evening when reading through my notes I will be thus be able to send a text or a note.  Which reminds me I have a few emails to send……names for emails in my notebook.

Like everything which is important to us there is a need to review how we do it.  There is a need to review how we nurture and develop.  Friendships are important no matter how long they last for.  They need nudging but more important than anything they need active work.

My note books are becoming even more important in the nurturing friendships.  I had always looked on Skype, video calls or face to face calls as tools for those who have family who may live thousands of miles away or for work.  Perhaps this is another way for nurturing friendships……


In what way are you going to nurture your friendships?

8 thoughts on “Friendships Are Hard Work.

  1. Also important are the smiles and little chats we exchange with strangers and with mini-friends like our favourite supermarket person. A thoughtful post!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. So true especially with “mini friends”.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. I remember the talk I had with one of my closest friends, that friendships need as much effort as romantic relationships. You are correct, it needs nurturing. Because in return, they too, and your relationship with them nurture you back.
    Real friendships are rare and beautiful. Esp. those who you do not talk to for quite a while, but when you see each other again, it feels like you just spoke to them an hour ago. I hope you get to bond with your friends again. This is a good read 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you for taking the time to read and to write a comment.
      As you say real friendships are beautiful.
      Can I return to you the wish that you reconnect with friends.
      Have a good day.

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Mairin Fionnbharra May 8, 2019 — 2:47 pm

    Good question Nóilín It is only a matter of doing it at the time but that is not always possible. Unless I write it down

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Writing it down is the only way for me also.


  4. You are so right friendship takes effort and a small text saying thinking of you keeps our friends close. Although, recently a friend challenged me on texting rather than ringing and I realised it’s a habit I fell out of as texting easier. I’m going to make a bigger effort to lift the phone more often. Maybe sometimes we need to hear the voice of our loved ones. Great post! 😁

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you for taking the time to post a comment.
      Your friend’s challenge has echoed with me and like you I need to lift the phone to ring more often.


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